There was nothing unusual about this day, no warnings or ominous signs that this day would forever change Ted's life. He awoke to the sounds of birds singing outside his window. After a long stretch, he rose and headed for the shower. His thoughts were focused on the activities of the day as he lingered under the steady stream of warm water. 

     The first sign of change came when he heard his wife's comments about a mole on his back. It was in the center of his back, out of his normal view. A visual examination with the help of a mirror convinced him he needed to see the dermatologist who subsequently removed the mole. 

     Two days later, the second sign of change arrived with a call from the dermatologist urging Ted's immediate return to his office. The lab report had signaled the alarm. It was melanoma, one of the deadliest forms of cancer.

     Ted was overwhelmed with emotions and unanswered questions. The doctor's report sounded like a death sentence. All Ted could think of was the many articles he had read about the threat of skin cancer. The papers and magazines were filled with them as the scientific community tried to warn the public of the sun's dangers. 

     At the time he had read these articles, he never thought the information would apply to him. How could this be happening now?  He had just spent an entire year procuring a building for his chiropractic office. He had successfully navigated through mounds of red tape and zoning regulations to open his practice five minutes from his home. Having watched each obstacle be removed as if by an unseen hand, Ted was convinced he was on his path. 

     So how was it possible for him to have cancer? Would his life be over in six months?  What would happen to his family?  His thoughts and feelings were filled with fear and confusion.

   After consulting with a holistic medical doctor, Ted agreed with the decision to take some surrounding tissue to be certain the cancer had been totally removed. To Ted's relief, the lab report showed no further sign of melanoma. The cloud was lifted. His life would continue. 

    The meaning of this event was symbolized by an image Ted had received. It was as if all of his fear, anger, and negative karma had focused in this one spot, a cancerous mole on his back. The surgeon had cut it out of his body, freeing him to continue in his spiritual growth. Ted was certain his life would now flow in harmony as he followed his path.

    Unfortunately, his crisis was not yet over. Several months later, Ted found a lump deep inside his armpit. The lab report again brought alarming news. It was malignant. He was reminded of his symbol explaining the meaning of his cancer, and he imagined this lump was a piece of the negative energy which had escaped the previous surgery. 

    Once again, Ted's mind was filled with questions, and his emotions were overrun by fear. As he contemplated his situation, he discovered he had no reason to live. He had already accomplished much in his life. He was not sure he needed to do more. He had two great children, but they could live without him. His marriage was not enough to keep him alive. These thoughts frightened him because without a reason to live, he might surely die.

    One day while lunching with a friend, Ted experienced a profound insight. An intense energy, felt by both of them, interrupted their conversation. They experienced a combination of sound and light reverberating as this energy field settled on Ted's body. 

    Ted began to receive inner guidance about the purpose of his life. He was told his primary mission was to be the light and to allow his light to radiate out to others and to the world. This mission would incorporate specific activities, but if he would simply focus on being the light, everything else would fall into place. He had a choice to make. He could accept or reject this mission. It was entirely up to him. 

    As he mentally accepted the mission presented to him, a peace fell over him. He was not sure if he would live or die, but he knew he would heal. He was certain that healing every aspect of his life was a crucial part of becoming light. To this day, Ted does not know exactly what this energy was that gave him these insights, but he is thankful for the experience.

    Ted had already made significant dietary changes. What he needed to do now was deal with his feelings. He needed to be honest with himself and others about his needs and responses. As he became more open and direct, his life continued to shift. He made a decision to leave his marriage. He reorganized his staff. These changes were sometimes painful, but Ted was committed to creating a healing environment for his continued growth.

    Crisis had given Ted the energy he needed to move in areas of his life in which he felt stuck. It offered him the opportunity to consciously choose life. Through these painful events, he learned to open to his feelings. He received a new understanding of his true purpose in life. Ted continues to grow as he learns to be present and honest with all aspects of himself.

Reverend Marty Varnadoe Dow, MSW

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